Morning Haiku: Back in the Habit

Colleagues, Hi, welcome.
Critical Thinking Skills now.
Try, You might like it.

Weather, Gloomy, Blah.
Food trucks hiding, I'm hungry.
Work Cafe. Sigh. Gross.

Does this Count?

Kim and I just picked out Easter candy for the office with Sec. Sebelius. Does that count as a celeb sighting? Should I have suggested that perhaps she should be buying carrots and such for the office instead...you know, people might talk.

SQUEEE!!

I just had my first work celebrity sighting. Now, I used to have a job where I would randomly see celebrities all the time. I don't know why. I guess it's from traveling so much that I would see random people in the airport, at the hotel (I am looking at your Chicago Bulls. Tallest. Celeb. Sighting. Ever.), in restaurants.

Here? Not so much. I think it's because my office is so far removed from the hustle and bustle of campus. I even missed Bono coming to campus. How do you miss Bono??

Today, my luck has changed. As I was walking to work, through campus, I saw, the one, the only, the venerable, and one of my all time faves, Mr. Kevin Spacey. Not 3 ft away from me. I stopped. I did a double take. Then I grinned and kept walking, knowing very well that if I were to introduce myself, it would come out very wrong as it normally does. So I kept to myself and decided that this was going to be my sign that my luck will change.

I know it's BS. But again, just go with it.

PSA

My PSA for you all today: Don't buy a house. Just don't. Or if you do, get some serious homeowners and make sure your inspection is done after a heavy rain.

Things I have discovered this week:

1. A huge leak in the guest bedroom coming from an old chimney that doesn't connect anymore.

2. A mini leak in the living room.

3. Huge cracks in the grout causing water to leak behind the tiles in both bathrooms.

4. My cold water pipes shake horribly. And it's not a question of bracing the pipes, it's a question of knocking into walls. SERIOUS walls.

This? Is not what I had imagined. Not what I signed up for when I bought this house.

I suggest you all just move back in with your parents.

Update: I just did my taxes. EVERYBODY SHOULD BUY A HOUSE. GO. Do it now.

Happy Birthday Failure

Dear Metro. Happy 35th Birthday. I have to say, from early days as a mini commuter rail to these recent years of being....a larger commuter rail that is generally unhelpful and sometimes kills people. You have truly grown. I have to wonder that if I am in as bad shape as metro is at 35, someone would put me in a home...or just out of my misery. I am going to suggest that now that Metro has passed its quarter-life crisis and has moved forward as an adult, that it consider getting. its. shit. together. Happy Birthday Metro. Grow up.

Channeling Tom Selleck

So the whole grade was on a field trip this week and one of the other teachers overheard a conversation between one of my students and one of her students. See, one of my students already appears to have a mustache. He has very dark hair, which also makes his facial hair darker. The conversation went like this...

Student 1: Dude, you totally have a mustache!

Student 2: Yep, you'll get one someday, when you're older.

My colleague said what was the most hysterical part was that he said it in such a cool way. Like he was the cool older kid giving the younger kid advice. The other boy thought he was the coolest kid ever. The girls in 2nd grade are all crazy in love with him. I guess a mustache still has that air of cool, even in second grade. I guess ladies do still fall for older boys-or at least older looking ones. Maybe we learn many of life's lessons in 2nd grade...

Fin.

Dear Work Dad, I SWEAR.
In one ear, out the other.
Shut up, listen, learn.